Someone please attack the marshmellow girl before she eats the walls.

Surely those of you who read the title of this entry have a vague idea that this post is about eating habits. You'd be correct. See, I'm a typical plutonian. I have natural curves that once upon a time were a good thing for the following reasons: child bearing, wearing body-shape specific clothing, and tribal sacrifices to the fertility goddess. I think that last one might be a joke but for all we know its probably true SOMEWHERE.

Either way, I find it interesting how people who barely know girls like me feel the need to interject their ideas on how a person should live their life without first getting the facts. I have affirmed that this usually results in a brilliant display of a persons misguided ignorance. They may FEEL they are helping someone, but they are in fact NOT. Why are their tips not helping? Why do they result as being hurtful or just downright annoying? Simply put, because they don't do their research on the person they are speaking to.

Take for example this scenario. A girl who works a front desk position for 2 days a week, 11 hours a week. The only time the staff see's her is on Friday afternoons right after she comes straight from her classes, and all day Saturday. On Friday she doesn't get to eat during the whole day because directly from her classes she goes straight to work, and since she works only 4 hours that day she doesn't get a lunch break (legally its fair. I mean they can't pay her to go have lunch just because she had class right?) but she IS hungry and if she's too tired and drained, she won't do her job properly right? In that case, the girl has a yogurt. She had brought a salad too but when one of her coworkers noticed she was shying away a bit because she felt uncomfortable eating anything while someone crowds over her, he called her out on it. tsk tsk mr. coworker. You don't know her eating habits. Leave the poor marshmellow girl alone!

The next day is a similar situation. She wakes up at 6am to rush getting dressed and packing her things (a laptop and a few books to keep her entertained since saturdays can be deadly boring at a lab where only strictly dedicated people show up on saturday). She can't have breakfast because she absolutely has to catch the 7am train. She picks up a BAGEL and ORANGE JUICE on her way to work. She is halfway through eating it when the lab doors are opened and she's allowed in so she brings what is left of her breakfast with her. Four hours pass and her half hour lunch is starting but in a Downtown area where healthy meals cost $20 and up, her only other options are fast food joints (mostly because of the time constraint as well. To get anywhere other than the McDonalds takes about 10 minutes, then if you count prep time of the food, add another ten, then a final ten to get back to work. She has no choice but to eat at the front desk). She takes her food and sits down to eat and two of her coworkers feel the need to strike judgement before really thinking things through.

Before OPENING YOUR MOUTH TO LET SOMETHING OUT, -take consideration of what the marshmellow girl PUTS INTO HER MOUTH when you're NOT watching. Marshmellow girl is the type of girl who lives for hiking in the woods, eating Kashi Wildberry mix cereals, granola bars with pieces of strawberry in it. Yogurt, and fruit, and salads with raspberry vinagrette are the STAPLES of her actual diet. So before you look at the burger ( A MEDIUM SIZED MEAL BY THE WAY. not even a large!) and frown in your mind thinking "gee I wonder how she became marshmellow girl", ask her what type of foods she eats at home, what her favorite fruits are, what she likes to drink. Or better yet, spend some actual one on one time with her, observe her regularly instead of on two days when she has no other choice than to act like a behemoth because her financial situation is tight and she can't afford to make an extra meal two nights out of the week just to throw out the leftovers that her parents wont eat because its HEALTHY. Consider knowing who you're judging before passing judgement. Or do the AMAZINGLY DIFFICULT THING of NOT judging someone at all. For all we know, you guys might like using razorblade dildos in your private time, HEY I DON'T JUDGE, JUST USE SOME ANTISEPTIC AND MAKE SURE TO CLEAN OFF THE BLOOD.


At the end of the day though, for all it's worth, just make DAMN sure you don't look at Marshmellow girl as though she is any less than any of you because I assure you, she's one of the best damn people you will ever meet and if a little beef patty once a week and a cup of yogurt are going to turn you off, then maybe you're the one who isn't good enough for her!


I'm craving yogurt, BITE ME;
Forever my own person,
Plutonia